tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32834564922650504322024-02-19T07:26:18.933-06:00Gary Smothers the Jaded HackAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.comBlogger44125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-35242663699994699832015-08-04T20:08:00.002-05:002015-08-04T20:08:16.410-05:00Writing a Novel: Start to Finish, Entry 19—Now What?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Writing a Novel:
Start to Finish, Entry 19—Now What?<o:p></o:p></div>
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As I’ve previously written, as all 22 of you that read the
last posting are aware of while the rest of you are now baffled and jealous of
the elite 22 for keeping up on such a hot blog, I’ve stepped away from TUG for
quite a bit. I’ve written exactly one short story since then and then edited
the hell out of it. It’s a pretty good one. I printed it and set it aside. So I’m
now out of practice. Again, as I’ve said before, writing a novel is like
telling an elaborately long winded lie. The problem is, I will now need to
print it out then start reading from scratch to re-familiarize myself with the
lie. And I’ve already had to do this a time or two before. I suck. So that’s
the next step. Not sucking, but reading it all again in one setting. No notes,
hell not even a writing utensil can be at hand. I want to experience it like an
actual reader would. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Now, I’d to try something different. I’m going to post a
sampling of the beginning. I posted a sampling before (Entry 11) and 55 people
read it! I’m going to post just the very, very beginning this time. I’d truly
appreciate some genuine feedback. A YES or a NO: Would you want to read further
having read the sample? <o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ll take you answers and any additional feedback into
account. Thanks. Instead of acting like I know what I’m doing, I’m asking for
help. If I knew what I was doing, I’d not start and stop so often. EIGHT
SENTENCES. Here goes:<o:p></o:p></div>
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TUG<o:p></o:p></div>
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Wind lashed at Thaddeus Pulliam, the driving rain cooling
him as he pulled the mud heavied rope slung at the middle of the young tree’s
height. His lungs burning and hands gone to numb, he allowed the fat rope to
sag momentarily as he recaptured any remaining strength. Slapping rain from his eyes, he stared
proudly, determinedly at the white spot of naked tree, the bark long ago worn
away smooth by the rope and his pulling. Lightening strung about the sky and
Thaddeus imagined an energy infusing into his body, charging him like a battery
for another pull. He dug into the mud with the side of his military boots and
braced for another pull. His lungs burned and his forearms twitched. In truth,
the last thing Thaddeus wanted to do was pull the rain slickened rope another
time. But he’d not win the tug-of-war come Labor Day without training and the
tree had not been worn smooth by thinking about another pull.<o:p></o:p></div>
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**AS ALWAYS, THIS BLOG HAS BEEN COMPLETELY UNEDITED.<o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-59553390246148070112015-07-30T22:00:00.000-05:002015-07-30T22:07:04.044-05:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY EIGHTEEN<div style="text-align: center;">
EVERY ONCE IN A BLUE MOON, LITERALLY</div>
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I haven't blogged since July 5, 2013. Exactly two years to the date that the fortunate event happened that woke me up. Thank You, James Patterson. I'm going to write again. </div>
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Again. </div>
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And this time I'm serious. I know, I know--I also said I'd quit drinking. And shooting heroin, but I never follow through. But...this time...I am. And I owe it all to James Patterson. Sometimes you have to step away, to quit, to say that you're through before you realize that you can't go out with a whimper. You can still say something and say it well. Thank you, James Patterson. </div>
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While driving home from Florida, a 13 hour ride that turned into 18 hours thanks to a horrific wreck that happened somewhere near Paducah, we'd decided to listen to James Patterson's THE LAKE HOUSE on CD. Having never been exposed to America's most successful writer (in terms of money), I was a little intrigued to hear what he had to say. A quick synopsis: kids are genetically engineered with birds in a secret government experiment. A mad scientist not associated with the project wants to kidnap them and milk them for his own nefarious needs. And there's a custody battle for the bird kids. If it sounds stupid, it's because it is. Very stupid. But, okay, one man's trash is another's treasure. I'm sure many admired this R.L. Stine quality story. Probably adults who grew up reading and watching Goosebumps. </div>
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Patterson is awful. His writing is atrocious. His dialogue was simplistic and boring. The sentences seemed about five words long. He says the same things twice, just a slightly different way. The kids didn't speak like kids--the man is out of touch with the modern child's lingo. The adults were pathetic cliches. The mad scientist was laughably evil--if that's even possible. I just wanted every character to die in a fiery explosion right at the end of chapter one. And the chapters! I think there was like 100 chapters, each about a paragraph long or so it seemed. This was Gary Smothers writing in his shitty roach filled apartment on 5th street as he emulated, horribly, Ray Bradbury and the Twilight Zone. </div>
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I'm serious, I'm better than this sell out hack. Perhaps he used to write well. And, yes, I'm being a bit unfair in two regards. 1) Maybe this is a poor sample of his abilities. 2) It's not his fault people snatch up his books (and CD's) by the millions. People, apparently, enjoy shit writing. I ran into an ex professor of mine in the grocery store yesterday and sounded off about the crap that is Patterson. And he summed it up well, "This is the reading level of the American reading public." I agree, But I wish he was wrong.</div>
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That's not to say that TUG is the next GREAT AMERICAN NOVEL. It ain't. But it's good. And it's going to get better. I wish I could have my book, even incomplete and mostly unedited as it is, manifest itself into</div>
a person. THE LAKE HOUSE would then do the same, book or CD. TUG would walk up to it, laugh at it, poke it in the chest, flick it in the nuts, then beat the snot out of the big bully.<br />
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It's a blue moon tonight and I'm writing--just the blog--but I'm getting in the mix again. How far removed was I from TUG? I had to find the damned thing. Thank goodness I was able to locate my most recent version of it. So, just for tonight, I can literally say that it's a blue moon, I must write. I'm like that boxer, the boxer I never was, who is sparring a bit with the weakest guy in the gym. Getting my footwork down. Rope a dope. Jab. Speed bag thumping me in the face for a wake up call. James Patterson as Mickey taunting me. </div>
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I can assure anyone that give a half a care, that I'm in this again. I can also assure anyone that cares that Thaddeus Pulliam will not have wings attached to him. That the kid he is training, Harry, will, not once, trill in pleasure. I also promise to have real dialogue. Most of all, I promise not to quit. So I'll sign off here. As always, this blog is not spell checked and probably riddled with grammatical errors. </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-27152915031237743652015-07-29T21:34:00.002-05:002015-07-29T21:34:35.699-05:00Writing a Novel, blah blah: Entry 17Just spent an hour posting a blog for my triumphant return. Then lost it somehow.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-40061418842178544812013-07-05T12:12:00.001-05:002013-07-05T14:18:01.120-05:00WRITING a NOVEL START to FINISH, Entry 16: I Am a Whore. Sort Of.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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So I've been going through this sort of writer's block. I guess that's what it is. That is to say, I still have good ideas, great scenes, characters, etc bouncing around in my head. Pushing against my skull,trying to leak out my ears to the page. But I can't. I can write a short story still. Just wrote a good one. A fucking love story from the guy who hates love stories and will most likely never experience a love truth. But that's another blog entirely. <br />
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I just can't pull the trigger on this book though. I've tried writing my way out of it. I KNOW the novel is the best writing I've ever created. I KNOW this can be great. It never will be if it's never written then shared though. And that brings me to my owning up to being a whore. In a sense. </div>
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I've identified the problem. </div>
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I don't have faith in myself. My first novel I submitted the hell out of. This was met with mixed results. Some houses wanted to see it. Some agents were interested. I even got to speak to Dominik Abel--Dean Koontz's agent. But, in the end was met with rejection. I was even prompted to write a short story about rejection which was then published. It would seem I'm an expert on rejection. You see, I'm not a romantic. I'm not going to pretend for one goddamned second that I write for me only. I'll never say, "but at least I got this story out of me." That's a lie. I write for praise. Without praise, my writing is just a hobby. I'm not deluded. A lot of writers are. They self publish, convicting themselves, friends, and family that, "This is the wave of the future. This is Me sharing my story with everyone." If everyone includes that same captive audience. </div>
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A whore may be as such for a variety of reasons. Attention, enjoys it, gets paid, mental mumbo jumbo. I am for all of the above. I want it all. Form a train and drive, drive! But I'm met with puritans. So to speak. And maybe it's because my writing isn't good enough. Maybe it's for lack of luck. Or both. </div>
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But it's hard to write a novel knowing it may never be read. Friends, family: I don't want to whore out myself to you. That's gross. I've decided that today I will submit, submit, submit before I continue writing TUG. Perhaps every now and again when a scene takes shape I'll jot it down. But I need my confidence back to be the whore I always dreamed of being. </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-66809786174158811182013-06-15T17:41:00.003-05:002013-06-15T17:43:51.186-05:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY FIFTEEN<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY FIFTEEN<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">The
Curse of the Chinese Finger Trap</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I’m tired of being stuck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m at a part in the novel that has me, I guess, not at all that
excited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m afraid this will show in
the writing which has been flowing well up until I reached this point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here is my issue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first 10,000 words are moving the story
along, setting up future events, and building characters up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then I get to a point in the book where what
I must write is simply that—a scene of necessity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not sexy, or future building, or character
driven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In short, it’s boring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been trying to use as little narration
as possible and this scene requires all narration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see, I believe that when a novel relies
on long periods of narration it’s a sign the author is writing out of his
ass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s easy to get going narrating
and get sucked into your own words, alight on the pretentious artsy wordage and
description.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hate that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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I’ve come up with a solution to get un-stuck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Because the harder I try getting out of this by staying in this scene,
the more stuck I get.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a Chinese
finger trap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like a finger trap, I’m wagering
that the less I try, the easier it will become to get out of this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not writing is not an option, the book won’t
write itself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m jumping ahead to
scenes I’m excited about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m stepping
backwards to spruce a couple scenes I’m capable of improving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
don’t like the stepping out of order, but it must be done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I’ve
let this entire logjam distract me completely in my writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m already seeing some success with this
finger trap approach despite not having written on TUG again just yet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve thought of a new short story—not an idea
that a story must be built around, but a complete story, a short-short
story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve decided to slop it down as
soon as I’m finished with this (the kids are with friends so I must seize to
moment) to see if it further spurs the ole writing legs to get moving again
instead of limping along like a zombie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>So
I’m getting off here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing on the new
idea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing tomorrow on a few
scenes:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>the climax, Thaddeus’ first day
down in the mine, sprucing up a description of the town of Humphrey to fit in
with an overall theme of the novel metaphorically (but not too pretentiously or
artfully so), and anything else I pull—quite neatly—out of my ass. </span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-60743844711240181272013-05-19T19:04:00.002-05:002013-05-21T22:44:21.929-05:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY FOURTEEN--LOVE, PORN, AND BASEBALL<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">LOVE,
PORN, AND BASEBALL</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>In re
to the last entry, I really want to believe I’m good enough to be great.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Great at writing. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it's truly hard to convince myself of that
when the writing isn’t, well, being written.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Last Sunday, when I get the lion’s share of writing done, was Mother’s
Day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I shifted it to Monday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Monday arrived and I didn’t do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t tell you what I even did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So it must’ve been worth it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m at a point in TUG where the real work
begins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first 10,000 words were like
the first few days of dating someone new, those days where you get that
fluttering in your chest and everything between you and her is possible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bills due don’t matter, the clunking in your
car is nothing, the ex-wife really isn’t all that bad after all…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But then reality hits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those little flaws in someone’s character or
your own surface and start to play tricks of doubt upon your once departed
brain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The heart isn’t enough to carry
thing alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The door is parted allowing
the light of hard, cold logic to cast upon the floor and promising of
unknowns.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will things work out as once
known?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>It’s
funny and pissy that writing a novel can play with your emotions and
confidence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s become work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And no one who is being honest enjoys
working.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unless you’re a porn star
maybe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even that gets old I’d assume
though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want to be that porn
star.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, actually it may be nice to
get that experience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But on screen it
ain’t going to happen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, I must
make it happen on paper—or screen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Screen first, then paper—hopefully—later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Which brings me to the point of why I’m not
writing today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>This
evening I do that other portion or writing work that no one enjoys.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gee, why don’t I strain my confidence and
create a unique cover letter for each prospective publisher or agent, then send
it off, wait for months, then get a form rejection letter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, I need to operate within this
business model.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After all, I did choose
to write these two other novels to be read by someone other than me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But here’s another reason I’ve been avoiding
it:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do I really want my confidence to
take all these hits as I’m creating something new?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the equivalent of a man thinking of
baseball to last longer—except it’s completely different?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thinking of baseball will numb the senses,
prolong something pleasant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Getting
rejection has no positive benefits, but it does numb the creative process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the fun, the ecstasy is in the creating—when
you get off your lazy ass and do it that is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>So
to sum up, writing is, at first, like falling in love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then it becomes a relationship, rife with all
its potential pitfalls, and logic guidance—work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then you wish you were a porn star.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then you decide to think of baseball.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, doesn’t that make a lot of sense?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will write tomorrow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After work I work again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There will be no cameras or boom mikes or
lubricant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just me and coffee and
currently intact confidence and ideas. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-30935579494192473152013-05-06T19:57:00.001-05:002013-05-06T19:57:35.681-05:00EVERYONE IS GOOD ENOUGH TO BE GREAT
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY THIRTEEN<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 22pt; line-height: 115%;">EVERYONE</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">
IS GOOD ENOUGH TO BE GREAT</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span> </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfbq3tZkRmEW-FGzypqzXChoNIHDuHmfVRUXEpvLkMH0-w5mCwRyEa8UwyR5JK_ut4WV4GnGfv2CC39JBN7qb1V35W5s1Np3-jzREz0uIwevFU-RVl9MLTl1czqXSXACSL2Odhpm3Xtu3F/s1600/th.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfbq3tZkRmEW-FGzypqzXChoNIHDuHmfVRUXEpvLkMH0-w5mCwRyEa8UwyR5JK_ut4WV4GnGfv2CC39JBN7qb1V35W5s1Np3-jzREz0uIwevFU-RVl9MLTl1czqXSXACSL2Odhpm3Xtu3F/s1600/th.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Finally!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s been a great week writing on TUG.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve surpassed the 10,000 word mark which
seems like a big deal, even if it’s just a number.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But 10,000 words sure sounds like
progress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve introduced, physically I
mean (he’s been spoken of) my antagonist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Jimmy Snadus is a wonderful piece of shit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I’m writing it I just want to bring him to
life and kick his ass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So that’s
good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Taking
a step away, as mentioned in the previous post, has really helped.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I’m to be doing that from here on
out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Screw my self-imposed
deadlines.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why force the issue?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m at a point in the story I hadn’t really
thought about so I need to think.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Letting the story breath on its own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No CPR, no AED device.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If it
dies, it dies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully, each weak it
takes another breath and keeps kicking it with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully, each and every week I want to kick
Jimmy Snadus’ ass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And maybe you will
someday as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fuck him, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Apart
from creating a good antagonist I wrote something very sweet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve had sweet moments in my fiction before,
but the difference with this developing story line is it’s ultimately about
life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nurturing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Growth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fatherhood and responsibility.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, in keeping balance, I’ve also introduced Harry,
a boy that Thaddeus is going to mentor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I wrote a scene I’m a bit shy to admit, made my eyes water.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a genuine sweet moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A moment I wish I would have had as a
child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I also nailed my
through line.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sure, it was always there
from the beginning but when Thaddeus tells Harry:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">grasped
Harry’s shoulders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Look at me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Look at me, boy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I can promise you this:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>everyone is good enough, good enough to be
great.”</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It kicks up the characters, the goals, the
spirit of what I’m trying to accomplish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It left me with a sense of elation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Let’s be honest
here:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I WANT TO BELIEVE I’M GOOD ENOUGH
TO BE GREAT.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span></span> </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-1RwSzXUsq7o0GK5-cR-sSgs5R9ttOb8t1G_jZ1mPRYmARkEOFN3cHqbmbLcSC2mRAz-0H1cuUUtIjuiyqmp8F0SzMEspy9p2o4Ws3zR3Vm91QMvL9j9WTXvox9Jgs0htcXEjQKnyrOga/s1600/58851_443648595719943_918698314_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-1RwSzXUsq7o0GK5-cR-sSgs5R9ttOb8t1G_jZ1mPRYmARkEOFN3cHqbmbLcSC2mRAz-0H1cuUUtIjuiyqmp8F0SzMEspy9p2o4Ws3zR3Vm91QMvL9j9WTXvox9Jgs0htcXEjQKnyrOga/s320/58851_443648595719943_918698314_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-4386475367695621582013-04-23T19:03:00.002-05:002013-04-23T19:03:51.590-05:00Want to Get Closer to Your Novel? Take a Step Away
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">WRITING A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY TWELVE<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Want to Get Closer to Your Novel?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take a Step Away<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">I
didn’t do much writing this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Writing, that is, on paper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was
getting too hung up on a word goal which is something I’ve said I wouldn’t do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was experiencing a bit of a mental
logjam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had all these cool ideas,
great scenes, and plot devices planned but couldn’t seem to connect the
dots.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, instead, I just thought about
TUG.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A lot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By thinking about the next scene’s setting—not
necessarily the scene itself—I was able to formulate how the entire a scene will
unfold.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Something
I realized I was doing right off in this book that needed correcting was the
settings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see, I had all these ideas
for scenes which were mostly dialogue driven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Action propels a novel, not ideas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Yes, I have a goal of keeping the narration down to a minimum, letting things
be shown through dialogue. I was overcompensating though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To keep with my goal, I need to entertain the
reader, as well as using this neat dialogue and these interchanges between
characters to show what is going on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One
way I can entertain the reader is to keep the scene settings unique.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>True, every novel has a main set, a main few
sets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, now that my main story
has been thrust into motion, it’s time to expand the boundaries these
characters are at risk of being confined in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">So
the next scene is set at an empty football field.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Two major characters are introduced
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t wait to write it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">I
also got in touch with my main character.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As Thaddeus is essentially me, boy he is mentoring is my son.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess I didn’t realize it to the degree
that this is true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But thinking of this
next scene, a mentor spending some crucial time, experiencing a potential life
altering moment THRU conversation, really struck me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want to take my son to the football field
with me (as soon as it stops raining one of these days) and sit there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sit there exactly as I have pictured.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Realize that this, albeit is research in a
way, is also a moment in his and my life that is so little on the surface, but
so much more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Someday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">So
I’ll write this scene this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’ll
be good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Distance has gotten me closer
to all these words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-70143546951552117962013-04-14T10:08:00.000-05:002013-04-14T10:16:51.006-05:00<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY ELEVEN<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Changing
Names to Protect the Innocent<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">or<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Let
Me Have It</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span> </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
went to a writer’s group the other day at the invitation of a fellow writer (I
won’t mention the group name because they feel they're pretty special-advertising
in the free newspaper and all to have these huge turnouts of seven people) I
was tentative in attending as a professional editor had told me I’m searching
for feedback too early.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I admit, I’m
curious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I write something I feel is
good, really good, and it’s exciting to see what others may think.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>It
was a waste of three hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After
awaiting everyone else’s read, I went.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
read five pages from Tug, the most recent pages which I’d written in a coffee
shop before attending.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had four pages
that were relatively polished I was going to read, but decided I’d test this group’s
mettle by reading five pages of mostly shit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I read.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I was finished I
asked, “Did the words come together right?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The guy who is running the show, Mr. Pretentious in his ill-fitting suit,
the guy who critiqued others and read nothing, says, “Yeah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pretty much, I think you got it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
felt like calling him on his bullshit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s not critique.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t
come here to get jacked off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came here
to get feedback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, I say, “Thanks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s good to hear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyone else?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Silence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, you used the word ‘retire’
three times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Really?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Waste of time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>So
I’m listening to Catherine Rankovic, the editor, and not putting myself out
there for feedback. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Except this one last
time. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m going to post just a touch of
what I read and see what the feedback through here is, if any.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does anyone really read this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’re not a writer, a response of THAT’S
PRETTY GOOD, or THAT SUCKS DONKEYS, or IT NEEDS SOME WORK will suffice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’re a writer, maybe elaborate on the
above.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’re a writer, we’re in this
together, why not support one another by being honest, by spending a few
minutes in a writer’s groups or providing real feedback when handed something
to read or being emailed something to look over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>As
far as the progress on Tug goes, I’m going to update my Tug consistency key
today, and break 10,000 words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
hope.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the “words aren’t coming
together right,” I’ll stop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s best
not to get hung up on self-imposed deadlines if they weaken the quality of
writing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I’m
growing a bit concerned about the closeness of the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The story, as I’ve said before is my
story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As such, a great many of the
people in the story are people I really know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This book involves infidelity, death, drug addiction, prison time,
fractured families, and other happy things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>To use the cliché, names have been changed to protect the innocent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Except, some of these people are far from
innocent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let me rephrase, names have
been changed to protect my own ass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
is concerning though, that my story takes place in this town, and I do still
need to live here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe I’m getting
ahead of myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe this never gets
published anyhow and the only visceral effect it has is on myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a problem, a good problem, for another
day. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">BELOW MY SAMPLE FOR EXPERIMENT—HOW POORLY DID THEY
CRITIQUE?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"></span> </div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"></span> </div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">(3)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Thaddeus
and Uncle Johnny sat on opposite sides of the hospice bed like, Thaddeus
thought, the proverbial angel and devil would straddle one’s shoulders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Except he wondered which he’d be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The thick smell of Jim Beam rolled from his
uncle like the fumes from the latrine duty Thaddeus had been so often saddled
with in the army.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even in the dim light
from the just lit kerosene heater he could see from Johnny’s red rimmed eyes
that his uncle would be retiring into a drunken sleep soon enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“You
don’t have to stay here, you know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Me
and your grandma, we got this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He just
gets all real kinda bad nights is all.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Dusty’s breaths came shallow, his death seeming to arrive with every
exhalation before another evil breath took in oxygen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Furthering the agony.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“All this talking today just sapped him is
it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“I
went looking for you today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m tired of
hearing all about your help.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Uncle
Johnny feathered back his greasy hair and snorted a laugh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“It’s a good thing you’re a head taller than
me, boy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who do you think is mopping
these floors, cutting the grass in the summer, taking grandma to the
store?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It ain’t you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">The
kerosene heater popped as the metal heated up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Before she retired to bed, Helena had insisted it be lit to keep the
chill off Dusty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The wavering flames shot
coven shadows of the two of them along the brick façade of the dining
room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“And
I know what you’re up to, young one.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“You
know what?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Stephanie
got on me for that morphine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your
grandma said you was having a little talk with her before coming in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I bet you’d like to tag that fine little
piece wouldn’t you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“What’s
your point?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I talked to a nurse.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“I
know’d she gave you some more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She don’t
like me, don’t trust me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some things you
just know from looking someone in the eye.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Thaddeus
nodded agreement then squatted over to the heater.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He dialed the flames down a notch before
stepping in to the living room and waving his uncle over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Johnny
patted Dusty gently on the side and bent to whisper something in his ear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He stood there staring down at Dusty in the
heated glow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I love him too, you
know.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said as he joined Thaddeus in
the cool grayness of the other room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“I
know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We shouldn’t talk like this in
front of him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What if he can hear?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s all locked up on the inside there,
probably hearing every word.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“He’s
my dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let me do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I swear, I’ll give it to him as ascribed.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“No.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Thaddeus,
please.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Uncle Johnny nodded down at
Thaddeus’ pocket.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Fish it out and hand
it over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I understand now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I do.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus committed a
flinch as Johnny’s blackened hand rose out of the dimness toward his face, only
to come to a clasp atop his shoulder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“What
I done was bad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“I
can’t trust you, Uncle Johnny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
anymore.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He stepped out of his uncle’s
clasp as tears began streaming down the man’s face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Go to bed, sleep off what you’ve drank and
we can have a cup of coffee in the morning.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Fuck
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’ll be dead in the morning.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Uncle Johnny swiped weakly at Thaddeus’ face,
then walked to one of the three standard boxy rooms of the house which he’d
taken up residence in since his release from prison. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Thaddeus
turned and leaned in the doorway, stroking the bulging of the morphine bottle
in his pocket, taking in the calmness of the glowing room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Let things take their course.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He expected his uncle’s shadow to appear
rising up behind him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When it didn’t,
“Goodnight, Uncle Johnny.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Thad.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus tilted his head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I know you don’t understand, son.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m in pain too.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Goodnight,
I said.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Fuck
you.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His uncle’s door clicked shut.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Despite
not being cold, Thaddeus went to the heater and stood over it, playing his
hands in the flowing heat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was only
10:00.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The rest of the night weighed on
him in a black doom like the evil sick inside his grandfather.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was time for the first dose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Thaddeus
went to his grandpa’s bedside and stared at the old man’s chest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seemed, again, as if he were dead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He brought a steady hand to the old man’s
ribs, rested it there, fingers on ribs—a butterfly on a sun bleached
corpse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An exhalation...and, yet again,
a hateful intake of air. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">He
dug the vial from his pocket and again played it across his callused
hands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Were it to fall and break he
would be crushed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Were it to fall and
break he would be elated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Another intake
of air, this time jagged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus
closed his fingers around the vial and turned to the side table.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He pinched the sponge tipped stick from the
table then placed the vial down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
eyedropper sat there—an unloaded .357 awaiting bullets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Carefully, he drew up the dosage Stephanie
had given him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For some reason, he
thought of when Miles was a baby and had been sick, giving him antibiotics via
an eyedropper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But this wasn’t going to
cure anything.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">This
eyedropper, this tiny amount of chemical infused liquid held a mercy, held a
promise to take everything—everything—away forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All the sunny days, and grassy fields, and
blue skies, and lovely man defining black coaling tunnels.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Thaddeus brought the eye dropper to Dusty’s mouth and pulled down on the
old man’s whiskered chin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Snaggle-toothed mouth and swollen tongue, breath smelling of a slow
ending of all things inside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was
suddenly afraid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Afraid of
everything:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Uncle Johnny sneaking up
behind him and snatching the vial away; Helena padding into the room and
witnessing what he was about to do; Dusty knowing what he was about to do and
screaming against it—all locked up on the inside; if the old man had “found
God” at some coherent, weak point in the day, but had not been read any sort of
last rites like they do in the movies because everyone was sure he was
recovering…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">So
he’d read him last rites of his own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>With each and every dosage, a last ministry.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“You
always kept a good garden, grandpa.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
remember those huge red tomatoes you had that one year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They put one in the newspaper—grandma was so
proud of them, she sent the Breeze a picture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I remember you complaining they tasted like cat shit from grandma’s cat
getting in the garden.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus found
himself smiling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He pulled down again on
the old man’s jaw, his mouth having closed and his lips setting like a bad
weld.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Don’t
ever be scared…of nothing</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">He lifted Dusty’s tongue with the
dropper and squirted the medicine in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">“It was a good garden.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">At midnight Dusty’s lips reacted
to the eyedropper like a baby to a nipple.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And they revisited the streetcar Dusty had told him he’d rode once in
Saint Louis while looking for a job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He’d rode his first escalator that day in the Peabody building.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Taken in a ball game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ate toasted raviolis and got drunk off Busch
beer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">At two a.m. they strolled across
the open fields abutting the western edge of town, shotguns cradled across
their arms, icy cold breeze of that day, a minty dip of tobacco in their mouths
and their eyes wide for sign of quail, that trilling of spooked bird as they
took to the air.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The old man had bagged
well over the limit and put some in Thaddeus’ pouch so his father could fry it
up for supper later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Thaddeaus worked a crossword
puzzle to while away the long minutes in between doses and even longer moments
in between breaths.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At some point, Uncle
Johnny needed convincing, again, that he was really okay to stay through until
breakfast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">“Go home, squirt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t sleep.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">“Go to bed, asshole.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t sleep either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be here until breakfast, when grandma’s
up.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Uncle Johnny stood above him,
arms crossed, hair a mess, his reading glasses askew and eying the
morphine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus leaned forward
casually and capped the bottle tightly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Goodnight.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He deposited it into
his pocket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">His uncle scoffed and shuffled
away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus stopped him as he exited
the warming glow of the dining room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Hey.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His uncle turned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The glow from the heater cast evil an yellow
onto his lenses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You didn’t ask how he
was.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">“How is he?” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">“He’s fine.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Without a word, he entered the
dark of the front room and was seen no more that morning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And at four in the morning, after revisiting
Dusty’s wedding day, the old man breathed no more. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM6EehAetI83mg36hXUrKdPYTc2EWNdEaIvhlLE4gHbRO-GThVSFW3Dff2C0RrWjOeqgIB13FCnjA1M2399ux2G9bz5PVeN8v2397RwCH-vv9UglKE256VyX1w1tooGQIqAZ4ICzpdCU5c/s1600/th.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM6EehAetI83mg36hXUrKdPYTc2EWNdEaIvhlLE4gHbRO-GThVSFW3Dff2C0RrWjOeqgIB13FCnjA1M2399ux2G9bz5PVeN8v2397RwCH-vv9UglKE256VyX1w1tooGQIqAZ4ICzpdCU5c/s1600/th.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-44377583967586851562013-04-07T17:45:00.000-05:002013-04-07T17:45:31.021-05:00
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY TEN<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">GREAT
PROGRESS THAT (F BOMB-ing) SUCKS<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I only wrote about 600 words this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I’m well satisfied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had a fellow writer ask me the other day
how to write a necessary scene that is emotional for personal reasons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gave her the immortal words of Harry
Crews:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Put your ass in the chair and
write it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did that today to
embarrassing consequences.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d driven to
a café to write as home represented more yard work and another load of laundry
to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m writing a scene where
Thaddeus is at his grandpa’s bedside at the time of his death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s my own story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s embellished very little.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s, as could be expected, gut wrenching
to write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m writing and my eyes get
all watery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I look away, think about
baseball or some such, then go back at it when the tears subside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then I’m all teared up again when the barista
comes to my table and asks how my sandwich is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I look up at her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Embarrassed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tell her the
sandwich is fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She asks if I’m
fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I say, “Allergies.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She, I’m pretty sure, fakes
understanding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Within a few minutes, I
pack up and leave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
put my ass in the chair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d been
avoiding the writing of this scene, and it’s not done yet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It will be, later today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I’m at home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d told the other writer some advice I’d
pulled out of my ass—hey it’s nice to be asked advice via a private message on
Facebook—I’d told her, “Arrange a reward for getting it done.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, I don’t have a reward arranged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t have anything arranged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have more of the same to do later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It will bum me out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I’m writing this scene, I’m there
again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m at his bedside dropping
morphine into his mouth and listening to the jagged breaths, watching the rise
and fall of his chest and expecting it to stop at a rise or a fall and never
move again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It fucking sucks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My only hope is that I can convey just how
much it fucking sucks to the reader.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Great progress though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-35354147146039888532013-04-02T20:39:00.002-05:002013-04-02T20:39:36.364-05:00BAD LUCK AND BAD MOOD MAKING MY WRITING GOOD
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY NINE<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">BAD
LUCK AND BAD MOOD MAKING MY WRITING GOOD</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">(I've said this once before)</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijfyzLQjyailXh8YLp1e1wA0FW0x4Hvb1pMfe-Yd7zwlCk1zvLTkCEnLdq_9UmAgg41X-aUJhtJay5Ji-uuJeMAm8WR6oliN7_Afr6uwHUMyYGNTQ30C6i13wCxFbrCqYYQ4uRqGjocdPs/s1600/bad-luck-all-of-it.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijfyzLQjyailXh8YLp1e1wA0FW0x4Hvb1pMfe-Yd7zwlCk1zvLTkCEnLdq_9UmAgg41X-aUJhtJay5Ji-uuJeMAm8WR6oliN7_Afr6uwHUMyYGNTQ30C6i13wCxFbrCqYYQ4uRqGjocdPs/s320/bad-luck-all-of-it.jpg" width="259" /></a></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Jesus Hector Christ, it’s been a supremely shitty
writing week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I almost gave up on
TUG.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Several times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From the virus, to the purported fix—then not
fixed—to the new issues…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I had backed everything up on my external hard drive
when all the trouble began.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No
problem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This way I was protected just
in case my computer needed reset.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I
got my computer back “repaired” I realized, to my horror that nothing had
saved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But that’s all mentioned before
in post eight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I rewrote what was
gone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I put it into my machine and, as I
suspected, it was much better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then my
computer started acting up again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Nice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I printed it right
away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I returned my computer to the
“repair shop.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They promised it’d be
back in two days at most.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I have
this hard copy and the re-saved new version on my external hard drive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I went to a winery (for the first time) and
had a really nice chat with the owner about writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She even offered to host a reading for me
sometime.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She kept insisting she’d love
to read what I’ve written and seemed well-read (ie: she doesn’t care for
Stephen King).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I’m kind of buzzed on
wine and go out to my car and grab my copy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Besides, it’s saved on my ex hard drive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Later, when I return home, I plug my drive into my
daughter’s laptop only to discover that the file exists—with 0 bytes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And my only copy is in a winery an hour and a
half away (probably in their trash can).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And the guy at the computer shop says he may need to reset my
laptop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, suffice it to say, “Fuck.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I went to Best Buy and bought a new computer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I returned home, plugged in my drive and started
writing from the last save point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I
think it’s better again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All I have to
do is have shitty luck to have good writing luck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m still awaiting the fate of my old
laptop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Now, on to writing stuff…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I’ve definitely quickened the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Remember that timeline I made?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was just a guide and is now pretty much
useless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it did serve a purpose in
allowing me to marshal my thoughts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
midway through chapter three and events originally scheduled for chapter five
are occurring now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I stopped writing tonight at a very
(hopefully) moving place in the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was a good writing evening because I’m feeling down in the dumps and
this is a sad part of the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Getting
down in the dumps always helps me write better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It makes me not live in the moment so much, causes me to become overly
introspective.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes the dreaded
future of things seems so clear that I feel fortunate to have clarity, any
clarity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This clarity seems to help me
to focus on the past, present, and future of pretend characters in a pretend
story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being as this story is,
basically, my story I can tune in to the mood so easily.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">So bad luck and sadness are my key.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lucky me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Performing a psychoanalysis of myself causes me to believe that the more
I want my story to succeed, the more I’ll determine ways to maintain this
melancholy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s a pretty stupid
statement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it just might be true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Three and a half chapters into things and I’m
thinking of taking a risk in chapter four.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I want all these goals, subplots, etc to be established by the end of
chapter four, that’ll be about 40 pages in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m trying to keep chapter length consistent at 10-12 pages.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The reason I feel this is a risk is that it’s
going to be a lot of information in a short space.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again, I want things organic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m avoiding as much narration as
possible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think I can do this through
dialogue and by my antagonist finally making a physical appearance in the story
(I want all the major characters to be introduced as well by the end of chapter
four).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I only wrote about 700 NEW words this week which
isn’t bad considering all the down time and frustration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I look to have hammered out the rest of
chapter three then get a good start on chapter four. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">At 7000 words and getting my pace back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again, screw that asshole hoodoo bad mojo
monster.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’ll lose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He always does.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-699907528040370102013-03-25T18:42:00.004-05:002013-03-25T18:44:13.422-05:00 FIGHTING THE HOODOO BAD MOJO WRITING CREEP WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY EIGHT<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhagjYznbTqn7IzLyypadjrLv5qQ2qYeAvZbsoMgiYzc4M2xIg9scpHifhTwGuOVxh5INZo-4hhQwLdoFC7YKO47ELEBEzMr9jfbvRhqtA_TnZFbvoZihNh7ZgPNn-LDFzlMgBazRSrBrnW/s1600/psycho-si-creep-michael-myers-mask-01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhagjYznbTqn7IzLyypadjrLv5qQ2qYeAvZbsoMgiYzc4M2xIg9scpHifhTwGuOVxh5INZo-4hhQwLdoFC7YKO47ELEBEzMr9jfbvRhqtA_TnZFbvoZihNh7ZgPNn-LDFzlMgBazRSrBrnW/s320/psycho-si-creep-michael-myers-mask-01.jpg" width="315" /></a></div>
<br />
FIGHTING THE HOODOO BAD MOJO WRITING CREEP<br />
<br />
<br />
A horrendous week of writing. I’m being stalked by a bad writing hoodoo monster. It seems to happen when working on a massive project—everything goes wrong at once. It’s almost like potential success is sometimes stalked (too much alliteration there) in flurries of bad luck. The Michael Meyer of ill will has his eyes set on crushing the spark of hope and drive and ambition. He can kiss my ass. This week the following has occurred with my writing: <br />
--computer virus hijacked my computer<br />
--lost my emergency back-up flash drive<br />
--my printer was suddenly “not read” by my printer<br />
--dropped my outline which blew away in the wind and down the street<br />
--spent 100.00 to fix my computer<br />
--my computer shut down after over an hour of highly productive work (after “being fixed,” mind you) and everything was lost despite my compulsive periodic saving<br />
--my “consistency key” has vanished off my hard drive and, despite being saved on my external hard drive, exists only as the title “Tug Consistency Key.” <br />
So now I’m getting pop-up errors about not being able to auto save. This thing will probably shut down again on me. <br />
BUT! Some good things did happen. I have remembered my tweaks and new stuff I’ve written and am going to do it all again—on paper. I finally got it to print and will take out a pencil and get busy. It may do me some good to reflect on the potential changes. The new stuff I did write and manage to save is really progressing the story. I decided to speed things along a bit. <br />
All the major information about Thaddeus will be developed in the first two and a half chapters. I feel this is important. Tug isn’t going to be an epic length book. I like it like that. Otherwise, I’m writing just to write and ripping off the story. And the readers. Whoever they may, hopefully, be. <br />
I will re-write my consistency key as well. I realized errors I made in my first two books most usually center around consistency. Even though I’m a fantastic liar, I even need to keep my facts straight. But above all, I have a lot of characters in this story. I arranged my characters sort of end of movie credit style, in order of appearance. For the more major characters I limited myself to one sentence about them. What is their most important element they’re bringing to the table? <br />
I’m at 6300 words now and going strong. Strong except for that asshole hoodoo bad mojo monster. He’ll lose. He always does. Poor guy. Go harass Stephen King. Please. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-20242250744083236532013-03-17T10:45:00.002-05:002013-03-17T10:45:43.479-05:00IT'S LIKE CROSSING A FROZEN POND
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY SEVEN<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I’m not writing this
week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I haven’t been in the frame of
mind for the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t even seem to
picture the characters in my head, see them in scene, predict their present—much
less their future.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This seems to happen
when I’m on to something good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get to
this point where I realize it is good, may even have potential to be slightly better
than good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But what if it’s not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What if I blow it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can have a fantastic start at anything
then let everyone down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">The thing is, I know
where I’m at in the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My timeline
has been modified to speed the beginning of the story along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I’m nervous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s like crossing a frozen pond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right off the shore where you can fall and
clutch at the land should you need to, you’re all guarded confidence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Further out in the middle of the freeze you’re
just fucked if something breaks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Getting
to the start is impossible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can die
there, covered over by your horrible miscalculation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">I’m going to try to
stop thinking about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll go for a drive
with the music off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll review those
cool ideas I had earlier in the week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll
bring up my laptop and stare at the blank screen, white and pristine as the
proverbial frozen water.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFKhjkBF76xIVUQQj6qknTioDJoiMBzhKzqBY8yCQfk_U46It9zLYC07eyqb23y6O5762mGt4oeJySYapR33gUpbxQ4fzFBsDjDCih-vHQJfilMIWBZbav_TNEV6uEy2I4y1M3E6cPxQo5/s1600/IMG_0117%5B1%5D.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFKhjkBF76xIVUQQj6qknTioDJoiMBzhKzqBY8yCQfk_U46It9zLYC07eyqb23y6O5762mGt4oeJySYapR33gUpbxQ4fzFBsDjDCih-vHQJfilMIWBZbav_TNEV6uEy2I4y1M3E6cPxQo5/s320/IMG_0117%5B1%5D.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Yeah, maybe that will
work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-75624540833391927332013-03-10T17:29:00.000-05:002013-03-10T17:34:25.691-05:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY SIX The Entry Where I Confess<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">WRITING
A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY SIX</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">The Entry Where I Confess</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-o1jSPdbOw0k/UT0JBZTxKhI/AAAAAAAAAG0/VPh0pu13LJc/s1600/IMG_0091%5B1%5D.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-o1jSPdbOw0k/UT0JBZTxKhI/AAAAAAAAAG0/VPh0pu13LJc/s320/IMG_0091%5B1%5D.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">The great Harry Crews
once said, "A writer's job is to get naked, to hide nothing, to look away
from nothing, to look at it," he wrote. "To not blink, to not be
embarrassed by it or ashamed of it. Strip it down and let's get to where the
blood is, where the bone is."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">And that’s exactly what
I’m doing with “Tug.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I look forward to
those stolen moments throughout the week where I can revisit these characters,
this down-trodden town and the pursuits within.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But I don’t miss the characters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s not a happy story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It aims
to happy in the long run, but it’s not a bullshitter story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It pulls no punches on the human
condition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most of all, it’s me. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s my story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My story too lacking of anything truly outstanding to warrant as a
memoir, but too full of literary quality to ignore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is art all around us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take a look at a situation—any situation you
find yourself in—and find the literary stuff that it’s made up of.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Find some catharsis in your situation and
write it down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each and every week, I’m
back at the events that made up last year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Tonight, I cried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, I guy
cried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was back in this particular
moment that had me welling up then and now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So I write it down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">But there’s a danger
inherent to writing so full of personal emotion:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>will YOUR experience translate as meaningful
onto the page?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think there’s this rule
to not write fiction with you as the character.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, fuck that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’re a good
enough writer, go ahead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you can make
your story someone else’s, do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you
can connect with a reader through story, write anything!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you can control the power of your words,
channel that feeling into words that nail another reader in the gut—write on
(pun {or double entendre?} intended).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>"If you're gonna write, for God in heaven's
sake, try to get naked, “Harry Crews said. “Try to write the truth. Try to get
underneath all the sham, all the excuses, all the lies that you've been
told."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Yes, try to get beneath
all the lies and excuses you’ve told yourself about yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Forget all those rationalizations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Show the dark side of yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grab onto that shit in your life that made
that dark side of yourself and embrace it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Without all that darkness, you probably wouldn’t be writing darkness in
the first place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So love on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cherish the darkness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should thank being locked and duct taped in
a closet oftentimes as a child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should
thank quite possibly being diddled by some man and fearful that I’ll remember
it someday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should thank being tiny
and booger nosed all the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Messy
hair, afraid to speak, in silent worship of all the other kids who were bigger
and braver than me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should thank being
told by a parent, I wasn’t able to be loved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I should thank the mystery visitor I’m denied having ever existed who
brought me toys and asked me if I wanted to live with her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should be happy that the tension in my
house pressed upon me each and every day and begged of escape.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">For now, I’ll just
write on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m at 5097 words and it’s
going well. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-88803525020964742832013-03-03T11:11:00.000-06:002013-03-03T11:11:16.641-06:00TREES BE DAMNED or TOO MANY SEXUAL REFERENCES IN A BLOG ABOUT WRITING
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">WRITING A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY FIVE</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
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TREES BE DAMNED or TOO MANY SEXUAL REFERENCES IN A BLOG ABOUT WRITING</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh34Pm2t52Asgl3KyMUm1NemrY-7bdx_PWgFSwcw9-hukUmasp8eQfUY1m3HsaMcVDK0K1htUosPj1dpWzmxbq3hNZdFEngD5rnd527wco9ehmSsRYLQLGy_-PHi7qi4YzgI7yZ1KIHMzAk/s1600/IMG_0074%5B1%5D.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh34Pm2t52Asgl3KyMUm1NemrY-7bdx_PWgFSwcw9-hukUmasp8eQfUY1m3HsaMcVDK0K1htUosPj1dpWzmxbq3hNZdFEngD5rnd527wco9ehmSsRYLQLGy_-PHi7qi4YzgI7yZ1KIHMzAk/s320/IMG_0074%5B1%5D.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<em>I'ts not the size that counts. Doing my very small part to take out a forest.</em></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><o:p> </o:p></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">I ended the week at 3,999 words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve printed this thing out, read it, read it
again, crossed this out, enhanced that, went back and back—which is against the
rules of writing—to the same material before moving on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But screw that rule.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I CAN’T move on until I have what came before
it in an ACCEPTABLE place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not
perfect, but I have all my material lined up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I MUST have my characterization consistent, their actions, the time of day,
the weather, the goals, the dialogue, the freaking color of shirt their wearing—everything—consistent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing anything of length is like telling
the biggest lie of your life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re on
trial for murder and you did it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shit,
THEY know you did it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But you have to
keep all these details in your innocent story straight, you must maintain your
credibility in at least one juror’s mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>For all it takes, is one to believe in you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Same thing with trying to get published.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have to convince just one agent or
publisher to believe in me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I must have
them read past five sentences in my book, maybe even read a paragraph.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then maybe a page, then maybe the entire
first chapter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Believe in me!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">So, yes, I break that little rule.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a good rule though, if followed
correctly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You don’t want to lose focus
of the ends you mean to meet but spinning your writing wheels (unnecessary alliteration)
with editing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m talking about
consistency, getting your traction back into the meat of the story before
moving on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your voice, your feel as you
write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hell, think of it as stretching
before a run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you don’t run, think of
it as foreplay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ha!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Print it out, take a pen to it,
input the changes and enhancements, ignore the grammar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Print it out again, take it to work in your
lunch bag.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take it onto the toilet with
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the bus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To the gym when you jog or sit in the
sauna.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just keep it with you and in your
mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Keep printing, keep
scribbling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">You can’t be a writer and want to save
trees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To hell with them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You want to see an en masse printing of your
novel, you want the National Park Service pissed off at you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So print away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I was running
through my first chapter I thought about what sort of feedback it would
receive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A writer should do that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is the reader going to think?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What assumptions will they make about the
next thing to happen?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What do they think
of Thaddeus?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What do they want for
him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most importantly, is he
likeable?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing is a business that
tests your trust, you’re faith in others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>On the one hand, you want positive feedback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the other, you want honest feedback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But who do you trust?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if they are kind enough to give honest
feedback which highlights negative aspects of your piece or areas they feel can
be improved, who are they to say so?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What credentials do they gave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If
they’re a college professor, are they a good one?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have they been published anyway?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If so, was it a good book?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does earlier said positive reader just want
to get in your pants?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are they afraid of
giving anything less than positive review because they want a positive review
from you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are you just masturbating your
own ego by providing it to people you know will give you a glowing review?</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">--I just said masturbating
in a blog about writing…</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Talk about the trust and rejection,
the irony of wanting to trust for honest feedback, but the ire at sometimes
hearing it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re an unsatisfiable bitch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I’m posting just my first two paragraphs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would appreciate some honest feedback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’d like to read more, let me know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I won’t let you, but let me know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’d put this book back on the shelf and
forget it before you’ve finished checking out with your new issue of MAD
magazine in hand, let me know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if
you’d like to offer me your first paragraphs of anything you’re writing for my
honest feedback, I promise, even if you destroy my first paragraph with brutal
honesty, if yours merits a glowing masturbatory review (that was completely
unnecessary and illogical) I’ll let you have it.</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Until
next week…</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">--</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wind lashed at Thaddeus Pulliam, the driving
rain cooling him as he pulled the mud heavied rope against the young tree.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His lungs burning and hands gone numb, he
allowed the fat rope to sag momentarily as he recaptured any remaining
strength.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Slapping rain from his eyes,
he stared proudly, determinedly at the white spot of naked tree, the bark long
ago worn away smooth by the rope and his pulling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lightening strung about the sky and Thaddeus
imagined the energy infusing into his body, charging him like a battery for
another pull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Quickly, he dug into the mud with the side of
his military boots then braced for the next pull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His lungs burned and his forearms twitched.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In truth, the last thing Thaddeus wanted to
do was pull the rain slickened rope another time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But he’d not win the tug-of-war without
training and the tree had not been worn smooth by <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">thinking </i>about another pull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And he had to win.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At all
costs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He wouldn’t face another day
knowing he’d given up with another pull left inside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’d never pull the tree down, he was fairly
certain of that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And that was fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’d damn sure try though. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thunder sounded against his back prefacing a
lightening strike behind the shed, a mere 20 yards away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thaddeus yelled at the rain and the mud and
the tree, squatted and pulled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The tree
bent and Thaddeus screamed at it, smiling as he took another inch of ground
from it in a sidestep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He pulled,
stepped, and fell hard onto the tore up ground.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">The back porch light flashed the
usual two-times code.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was time to
come in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With a growl, Thaddeus released
the rope and stumbled to the back porch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The muscle tissue in his legs pounded, all flushed with blood as they
began an immediate recovery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All the
exertion gone, it became suddenly apparent to Thaddeus that this was a cold
November rain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Under cover of the
porch, he stripped off his boots and sweat suit, stopping at his
underwear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The door parted open and
without looking at him, his daughter handed out a towel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He dried himself then stepped inside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“Thank you, hon.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-35457502514027546402013-02-24T11:41:00.000-06:002013-02-24T11:46:03.914-06:00<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">WRITING A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY FOUR</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A Jaded Hack
afterschool special</span></div>
<br />
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ended the week at 1686 words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel MOST of them are good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I must admit, I am a cannibal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll cannibalize all that was written before
this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If it’s something you I can use, I
use it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t care if it’s a sentence
out of a story I wrote in the eighth grade—if it can be ripped out of the flesh
of something larger, make like a zombie and rip it’s heart out and use it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or consider eating it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If an entire story can be retrofitted with my
new characters, that is, if it matches the tone of the new piece or can be
matched, use it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gained over 600 words
this week by doing as such.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to
describe my town, or the fictional town of Humphrey as it is in my book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, hey, for purposes of full
disclosure:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>the town is my hometown of
Kincaid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The main character is me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The other characters, well, their names have
been changed for all those reasons dramatic pieces or made for television shows
tell you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’d written an essay in college about where I live and how
it helped to shape my identity (a writer almost never gets rid of something he
think has any merit).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember my
professor had went on and on about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
wondered if it is still good, was his perception viable, and was I swooned with
too much praise to see the faults in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Yes and no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>About 75% of it was
crap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, 25% was pretty good and could
now be made better because I’m a better writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So I ripped the decent portions out, put them together, and stitched
them into my story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A week of only 600 words may sound lazy to some, but it was
a productive week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I fit a great setting
into my novel, I re-read what had came before and upgraded it, I had some major
epiphanies about the book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also
destroyed a lot of stuff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of my
handwritten segments of story just weren’t right for this book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I burnt them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had no merit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had to go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s something I do which I’ve never really
shared before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a sort of
hoo-doo-voodoo ritual do. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s not a
lot of ritual to it actually, there are no theatrics.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t don a special robe or kill any small
reptiles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I simply wad it up and burn
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And what happened the next day after
my burning?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had a huge breakthrough
which I will write today.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I now have a Point Z.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can now wrote from Point A to Point Z with clear direction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was parallel parking my car when the ending
of my novel came to me, all courtesy of an empty, junked up lot on the
passenger side of my car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I immediately
wrote it down when back at my desk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">So, become a cannibal and burn to death your
babies before they grow up and tease you with a promise that never was. </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-17938085446408320622013-02-16T11:55:00.000-06:002013-02-16T11:56:22.621-06:00<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">WRITING A NOVEL:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>START TO FINISH, ENTRY THREE</span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A Jaded Hack
afterschool special</span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> This is an empty room. A must! Except for me in there, of course. </span></o:p></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My working title of the novel:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>TUG</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Only spent about 45 minutes Sunday night writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got the intro down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel that I nailed it, but that’s ancient
history.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ll see how I feel later on
down the road.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will be re-reading
several times though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each time I start
a fresh session of writing, I re-read almost all that came before it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is, in the beginning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I’m deep into it, it’s not very
practical.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In that case, I’m reading the
chapter or two preceding what I’m about to write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All this re-reading is done to get me into
the voice of the story, the feel, etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When I do this, I’m NOT reading for content, but the tone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’ll come later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tonight I crapped out so quickly for two reasons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>1. I’m tired, it’s the end of the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>2.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
got as far as I could go without forcing the writing just to say I’m
writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>–Writing is not a race.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In fact, I’m happy with 500 words a
night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tonight I had<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>611 good words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll take 500 good words over 1000 words for
the sake of words any night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My next opportunity to write will be Monday night, late
though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That being said, I can spend my
stolen minutes brainstorming the sticking point I’m at.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want to go any further without fully
realizing who, besides Thaddeus himself, is the antagonist here?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can appreciate the struggle against one’s
self, but it’s just not something I want to try to carry an entire novel
through with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have some general ideas
and should arrive at this by next weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I ended my night writing the way I always do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I write in bold letters a generalized
statement of the next scene or any important notes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the next scene needs to be skipped to get
to the one I already know where I’m going with, I note about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do this so I can get back into the writing
more quickly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It only takes a couple
minutes to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the equivalent of
putting shells in a shotgun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s ready
when you need it to blast away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tuesday—wrote again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too
tired Monday after a long day and kid events in the evening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The type of writing I do may not be for
everyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t have a lot of free
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes when I have the time I’m
too tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a caffeine compelled
writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am a loud and fast music
writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need the adrenaline amped up,
the pressure of going against a clock, of meeting a deadline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a reactionary writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That being said, I need solitude to get to
the point of all these ideas to actually put onto paper (or the screen as it
is).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of my best writing
breakthroughs come from driving in my car with the music off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Monday night, while driving to a sporting
event for my daughter an hour away, I had several eureka moments with my dear
Thaddeus in mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also determined who
the thorn in his side will be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I drove
along talking out loud like a schizophrenic about my sticking points.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thankfully, it was dark so the folks going
down the interstate beside me didn’t witness my nuttiness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hey, it works for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I’m stuck—take a ride and talk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d
returned home excited to get at it the next day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tuesday<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>found me ready
to gun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mapped out my timeline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I do this, I can only go so far.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t go all the way through.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel by mapping the entire thing out I would
be writing like reading from a cookbook.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s time to do this now, put this in here right about now, etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s not very organic and stifles the
creative process for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I re-read what came
before and made some changes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I realized
two things the night before:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>my intro
was very basic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t effectively put
across who Thaddeus was in as condensed a space as possible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel it’s important to get across to the
reader who the protag is, what he looks like, his age, a little of his psyche,
etc, right off the bat so that mental image can be provided.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also wanted to put across what his family
status is, his financial status, his town, his house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I didn’t want to recipe write it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had to think of organic telling of
this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did so Tuesday.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I wrote sort of guerrilla warfare style the rest
of the week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A post it note here while
sitting at my desk at work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A scribble
here while driving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Talking into my
iPhone to take notes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sitting at the
laptop for a 15 minute jam session.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At
week end I ended up at 1094 words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
very satisfied with what I have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want
to point out though, as I referenced earlier in sentence three of this entry, “I
feel that I nailed it, but that’s ancient history.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By Tuesday I was completely dissatisfied with
what I had put down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll see how these
thousand words look this Sunday. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"></span><br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-80539299150136177792013-02-10T09:22:00.000-06:002013-02-10T09:22:00.626-06:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY TWO<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">a Jaded Hack
afterschool special</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">First of all, a
disclaimer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m no expert.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I do think that I have a method to my madness which works well for
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even when it’s not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing a book is tough business.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The best way I’ve ever heard this stated is
by Harry Crews, see the previous post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Where I’m at right now in the process is what I like to call the pre-vomit stage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Eloquent isn’t it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All this junk, this idea, is stirred up
inside me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mouth is salivating and,
soon enough, it’ll all come spewing out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This idea is gathering steam, it’s growing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But an idea is not enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to add some flesh to it (I’ve skipped
analogies), it’s the skeleton of something that could be grand, if I make it
purty enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m noting it all down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s not a pretty business and consists of organized sittings to make
some careful notes, it’s made up of post it notes, scribbled on the back of
receipts, on my hand—wherever and whenever an idea hits me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have my main character and now I need to
determine, as concrete as I can, what is it he wants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, of course, what’s going to get in his
way. All this beinbg said, I like to keep my writing as organic as possible. I feel that a lot of writers can be too careful, to scholarly, and note, note note. Organize, organize. Map this, sketch that. Just write the damned thing already. After awhile all your pedantic ways are just an elaborate tactic at stalling. Put your ass in the chair and write something.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m writing the history for Thaddeus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why he is the way he is...<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What he is...<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ll also recognize how closely this character resembles me and it’s not
a pretty sight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve come to realize
that all these traits I’ve put down are pretty negative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can’t have a novel in which the main
character is largely unlikable (unless it’s Catcher in the Rye).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I need to soften him up, right off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have positive traits, I need to present
those right off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m thinking of The
Road by Cormac McCarthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Man does
some pretty abhorrent things to survive, he’s very strict, he teaches the Boy
how to commit suicide, puts the gun to the child’s head several times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the beginning of that novel Cormac spells
out his character’s virtue right off, “He knew only that the child was his
warrant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If he is not the word of God God never spoke.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s three pages into the narrative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So that got me to thinking about Thaddeus
Pulliam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then I found my solution to
soften him up, to make You, the reader, like him and root for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To me, this is the most important thing in a
story if it’s going to be a nitty gritty story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And that’s what this is going to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A story populated with rough characters in a rough town.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">My noting is almost done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Later int he week</span>, I’ll be onto some very minor
research.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some writers like to do a lot
of research up front.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m almost never
writing anything technical and find that the lion’s share of my research is
done as needed—if I find I’m bullshitting you too much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In this instance, I want to look at some
stuff that will help to flesh out Thaddeus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So that's it up to this point. I'm getting that image in my head, the opening scene. Actaully, it's been in my head since the inception of this book. I've dreamed about it. Now comes the hardest part--doing justice to something you've pictured so well. It's the best scene in any movie you've watched, the one you see on the trailers and think about how much you can't wait to see the rest of the story. It can be a daunting task, but I am up to it. I have to believe that.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-43761060833537031002013-02-07T12:51:00.001-06:002013-02-07T12:51:50.517-06:00listen to Harry Crews (baby)<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/aENeUNapdjM" width="459"></iframe><br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-3677647597104817702013-02-05T21:29:00.002-06:002013-02-05T21:29:56.625-06:00WRITING A NOVEL: START TO FINISH, ENTRY ONE
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m going to start writing another novel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve always maintained this blog as a way to
vent my writing frustration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing a
novel can be frustrating to say the least.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve always tried to show writing the way it really is (at least for
me).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, I’ve said before that
I don’t write because I have to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In my
opinion, that’s usually a bunch of sissified melodramatic crap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’ll die if I don’t do this!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bullshit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And that’s what I’m going to do, tell it the way I think it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Show the process for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The ups, the downs, and the downs, and the
downs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I’m not stopping at the
writing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m maintaining this through
the editing, the re-writing, the query letter, the synopsis, the submitting,
the agent hunting, the REJECTION, the small victories—and hopefully—the biggest
victory of all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, nobody, I got
this idea which will accomplish two things for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One, it’ll compel me to, literally, put up or
shut up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Two, it’ll help me to organize
my thoughts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The unofficial third thing
it just might do is allow for feedback from anyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s all welcome.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m not going to go into the story all that much—it’s my
story to tell.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t really fear my
idea getting stolen so much, it’s just my story alone to tell.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes, it will be referenced to make a
point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can say that the novel
would/will be my third.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first—a
major learning process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second—I
truly believe in, albeit it’s a much shorter book than the first one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This third novel—I’d like to think I’m
getting it figured out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can also say
that this story is very personal to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s not autobiographical, not exactly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s straight fiction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No aliens,
monsters, or teenage vampires.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just some
white trash.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I realize this may not be read that much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Screw you if you’re not reading this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m still going through with it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I hope that if you’re a writer, you may find some interest in this
project.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope if you’re interested in
writing at all, you learn a bit about process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve complained before about people saying, “I got this idea for a good
book I think I’ll write someday.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Really?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s that easy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, butt-face, it’s not.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">These entries won’t be perfect as I’m not spending a great
deal of time proofreading, pretty much just running spell-check—I’ve got
writing to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First post, this Sunday.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-9039281740367407672013-01-29T21:20:00.001-06:002013-01-29T21:20:17.698-06:00WRITING FUNK--the idea guyI've been in a writing funk. Let's be honest, you, no one at all reading this, as my Confessor. I'm not for sure what it is. I may have an inkling of an idea. Ideas. That's all I have anymore. Someone I really respect once called me an IDEA GUY--the last thing a writer ever wants to hear. An IDEA GUY can't write. Sure, he can think of cool shit, just can't put it to paper. The old saying, put up or shut up comes to mind. <br />
<br />
I started two stories. One, an intimate portrait of a man on his deathbed being tended to by two enemies--a true story. The other, a freaking love story! I was in something akin to love once a couple months back. Ended in disaster.<br />
<br />
Here's the thing (I hate that empty saying): I'm distracted in my "single" days, I'm not confident right now, I'm writing with the thought that it'll never see the light of day, I'm writing with disappointment in most of my former publications which (take a breath for this long sentence), which...I took like a writer whore. I accepted publication from magazines I don't even admit to. E-zines mostly. Sure, I turned them down before (well, once). So I'm all out of sorts. Ironically, the IDEA MAN, is grappling for any idea to get him going again. Someone has recently been kind enough to read some of this stuff that may never see the light of idea and give comments on it. Much appreciation. Maybe this will get me revving again. Besides, I have a lot of ideas.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-46989125642346775762013-01-12T16:20:00.000-06:002013-01-12T16:20:24.917-06:00FEAR IS A FACTOR, EVEN FOR THE ARROGANTI've got two novels written, one is a bloated but well written thing, the other is a streamlined direct punch. The latter is my favorite. But I'll never give it or it's fatter brother see the light of day. This is because I'm a pussy. I write these things then sit back and relish how well written I THINK they are, but I don't send them off--I'm scared of rejection. I spent two years on fat ass, which used to be fatter, and a year on the young, athletic one. I spend no time trying to publish them. So why'd I ever write them? I'm not going to bullshit anyone and say, "I write because I have to." I generally disagree with that artful rubber stamp many writers like to spout off. I don't think any writer is really like that. Well, if they are, they're in an insane asylum for some profound OCD condition. I write to get published. Sure, that's a bit arrogant. I think we're all that way if we're writing then trying to publish it--"I have an idea and I'm going to write it, work with it, then show everyone what I did. It's that good. Look!" So I can send off my short stories en masse, but why not my novels? One, it's a lot of work--more than sending off a short story. You have to put together that perfect query letter, that ever important letter designed to get someone's attention. But it can only be one page, it has to sum up you, your writing style, your novel, your history, and mention your opinion on the state of economic affairs in Eastern Europe. Then you have the synopsis, if required. Sum up your book in a page, like a TV Guide capsule description. And make it interesting. I've read descriptions of how a synopsis made the reader cry for joy or attach themselves so much to the story that they could see it as a movie. SOLD! <br />
<br />
Maybe I'm lazy.<br />
Maybe I'm scared.<br />
Maybe I know they're not good enough. <br />
Hell! I know they are. I've read some real crap lately. Sure, I know they both need that professional editorial eye, that litany of suggestions from a publisher. Shit, I'd sell my left testical to get published. But I'll never self publish. I want to make it on my own merit. And I realize it takes persistence and a lot of luck. One thing is for sure, I'll never get it published without growing a pair of testicles and submitting. Hell, I can't even afford to trade the left one away at this point. This post has degraded to a ramble.<br />
<br />
I'm just being a coward. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-33522979554657351332012-11-24T08:34:00.002-06:002012-11-24T08:34:28.992-06:00LAYING MYSELF BARE, WHY I WRITE DARKNESS
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Someone once asked me why I don’t write anything happy or
funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am happy sometime, I’m funny—or
so I’ve been told.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Johnny Cash had his
black outfits, his dark songs (skip the bullshit gospel junk).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have my stories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wish I didn’t sometimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most of my stories are ripped right from my
life in some capacity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In “Tom Ford, the
Girl, and Rejection” he loses his family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Ditto.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In “The Numbness” he
encounters his father corpse, a man he hated all his life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ditto.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In “The Surrogate” she longs to have loving family minus an insane
mother and abusive father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ditto.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the yet unpublished “A Patch of Earth, a
Spot of Sky” he tries, and for the most part is unsuccessful, to come to terms
with showing feelings of sadness for someone he’d admired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could go on and on…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess what I’m saying is that I’ve never
had that feeling of contentment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m 39,
about halfway finished with my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m pretty much broke for the
time being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I worry constantly about the
next catastrophe to come down the pipeline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Women, the one’s I’d be interested in are married, attached, or more
messed up than myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of the them
enjoy my company when it’s necessary to get a fix of feeling good about
themselves and then they move on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
left alone again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I condone it
through my actions so I must get that fix as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not a happy time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Therefore, I write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s during the shitty times that I write
the most.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So maybe someday I’ll not
write at all because I’m content.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or
maybe I’ll write that sweet story that must be inside of me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’ll be my own version of that Johnny Cash
gospel music phase.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Until then, I’m the
man in black. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-53044890906594740492012-11-18T08:57:00.002-06:002012-11-18T09:00:00.383-06:00Digital Publishing--No, sir, I don't like it.It's been a good past couple of weeks writing-wise. Found out I was published and didn't know about it. This I can blame on two things: I never check Submishmash for follow up because I assume I'm going to get an email or phone call if I'm wanted, two: they never emailed which they usually(no I mean always) do if your story is wanted. It's a nice looking publication and I was paid $00.00 which is nice. Another story, I found out was accepted as well. I feel it's too good for their mag. Looking at the number of acceptances they have each e-zine issue tells me the story either isn't that good or it's too good to not see paper. I'm having a difficult time embracing the digital format. I know it's the wave of the future and all, but I like seeing mags I was printed in on the top shelf of my bookcase--not bookmarked on my computer. Vanity. <br />
<br />
My novella <em>Penitence</em> was introduced to the digital world. I haven't seen a penny from Amazon yet. I made money when it was in paper though. After I got the rights back to it I rushed to upload it onto Amazon which, despite their advertisements, is an assload of work if you want it to look nice. I'll have to look into not receiving any money. According to their site, I've sold several copies and am owed my whopping .31 a copy sold. But I'm not retiring anytime soon even if they pay me.<br />
<br />
My buddy Benltey Little mailed me a letter last month. In it, he responded to my bitching about the digital format. He too doesn't seem to care for it. He did, though, liken it to his being published in several low budget magazines which are no longer in print. Take what you can get. He told me to shoot for paper pubs first, then settle for digital. I'll settle for digital with some of my stuff. But the stuff of mine that I know is damned good will have to wait for paper. <br />
<br />
Here's my flash fiction story, The Numbness, published in Emerge (page 28-29): <a href="http://issuu.com/emergeliteraryjournal/docs/emerge_literary_journal_october_2012?mode=window&viewMode=doublePage">http://issuu.com/emergeliteraryjournal/docs/emerge_literary_journal_october_2012?mode=window&viewMode=doublePage</a> Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3283456492265050432.post-30613154196338245162012-11-13T09:30:00.000-06:002012-11-13T09:30:24.412-06:00It's Not a HobbyWriting. What other hobby can make you feel so good and so bad at once? None. But it's not a hobby. Writing is something you do because you know you can do it. You may even be so flamboyant as to think it'll be published. One thing I've learned though, is to separate the two aspects of writing, the putting it all down on paper and the submitting. There have been a very few times when I've written something that actually made me tear up with thoughts that "this is good. this is really good." There is no reason to give myself that feeling then check the status of submissions at my submission email address. There isn't a reason to check my Submittable to see if something that once made me feel like crying for joy now makes me feel like sobbing for other reasons. <br />
<br />
My story "A Patch of Earth, a Spot of Sky" is one of those such stories. I wrote it, felt all gooey inside after doing it, then sat on it forever. I looked at it again and still thought, it's pretty damned good. I edited it, changed some things around, then felt all gooey--gooier even. I sat on it some more. Finally, I sent it off. First to one mag, then a bunch of them. To date, it's out there in the writing ether. Imagine my disappointment when I got the first rejection. With no comments. But it's only one. And it's been out for awhile. I'm curious to see if this story that I'm so close to, that I've totally departed from my more traditional style, is as good as I think it is. But if it isn't, eventually it will be. And I'll get that gooey feeling again, that pretentiousness that prompts me to submit it. I've made it a rule to not check for these submissions statuses until after a couple hours of writing. If I feel the writer's high, to heck with checking it. I'll ride this feeling, then check later. <br />
<br />
Now, about my book I need to submit... Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05159044364780864011noreply@blogger.com0